Traditions Now Measured In Minutes Instead of Centuries: Change Due to the Internet and Social media

Traditions-FNT-Small.pngLLANIDLOES, WALES – Died-in-the-wool traditionalists are bemoaning the gradual loss of community-minded events like May Day, and the Internet and social media are being blamed.

“I am completely disgusted. There isn’t a Maypole to be found within five-hundred miles these days,” said Eddie Stempowski, thirty-one, from London. “The next thing we know, traditions like Christmas and St. Valentine’s day will disappear too. You just watch.”

“And what about Maslenitsa? “ he continued, “It used to happen at the end of February and lasted a week. We celebrated the end of winter. My family cooked pancakes over fires and burnt straw scarecrows of winter. But last February when I lit a fire, a hook and ladder truck showed up. I blame those busybodies on social media.”

Mr. Stempowski is not alone in noting this alarming trend in disappearing traditions and his observations are backed up by solid research.

An Oxford University study has shown that traditions previously begun, carried on and passed down for hundreds of years are now being started, practiced and then discarded within minutes.

This flouting of habitual group behavior that, once established with symbolic meaning, used to persist and be passed on to later generations, does not bode well for the future.

“My friends and I had a tradition between eleven o’clock and noon of sending hashtagged photos to each other” said Tara Loudsen, who is studying first-year milk carton decorating at university. “But that was so this morning.”

“I tried to start a tradition in my family,” grumbled twenty-three year old Shawn Overmyer, looking down at his smartphone while he texted as he talked, not making eye contact, “And I set the boundaries for it and everything, but I couldn’t get anyone else interested in posting disappearing media to the Internet.”   Source: FNT Staff

Photo credit: Original images at: Sykes Cottages, CNBC

Report: Government Study Finds “Lake With a Hill On It” Safe For Use, After Social Media Scare

Lake-Hill-FNT-SmallOTTAWA – Social media platforms sent out a wave of geotagged #allclears and #oktogothere after the federal government released the report of a study giving Hill Lake in Algonquin Park a clean bill of health. The study, which cost $11 million, was carried out by a team of researchers after Twitter and Facebook users had spread widespread alarm a year and a half ago about a possible safety hazard.

The lake had immediately trended as #dangerous, #unsafe and #dontgothere after it was reported to have a hill on it, by a concerned parent. The researchers found however, after an extensive survey, that it had only been an optical illusion.

“We’re happy to report that there is absolutely no danger to the public,” said Tony Camparo, a spokesperson from Health and Safety Canada. “And it was wise to be on the safe side, because if there had been a hill there, someone might have fallen and broken a leg, or something.”

Comparo noted that in spite of the concerns raised through social media, and the government’s quick response to quell the panic and put people’s minds at ease, not everyone had been happy about the report.

It was a big disappointment to the extreme sport crowd who had immediately rushed out and bought downhill water skis. Also, he said the treasury board had been a bit miffed about the overall cost of the study.

“So if we can ever trace who spread the rumour in the first place, they will get such a bill in the mail.” Source: FNT Staff

Photo credit: Original images at: Kamloops Trails , Safety Supply Warehouse , EconyX Media , Web Marketing Pros