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Business and Finance: Rumour of Corporate Merger Between Bitcoin and Cannabis Consortium Sends Markets Into a Spin

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Bitcoin-MJ-FNT-Small.pngNEW YORK – Rumours began flying around Wall Street on Monday about a potential corporate merger between the spectacularly bullish fiat currency upstart, Bitcoin, and a group of seven marijuana growers and marketers from different countries around the world that banded together to form a cannabis consortium. This near, not-quite-news sent the financial markets into a spin.

Market analysts speculated that although the financial marketplaces didn’t have a lot of details about the rumoured merger as yet, such a corporate bonding would make for a sound investment, because the two industries represent the fastest growing business sectors in the world today.

Bitcoin prices and marijuana stocks spiked sharply upward in early trading on the currency and stock exchanges, then briefly crashed as the AI tradebots that supposedly acted for investors frantically worked to self-adjust their algorithms to the market frenzy, while still looking after their own interests first.

Prices then climbed back up again to stabilize at 3.9 % below where they were before the unconfirmed buzz about the merger.

Trading was abruptly halted twice during the run-up and crash. When prices had recovered to near (but not quite) normal again, one of the market regulators explained to disappointed investors who had jumped in to the market and then lost their capital, why, once the trading had stabilized, prices were now down almost four percent, on supposed good news.

“Well, all the analysts bought in early, before the rumour was made public. And all the bots took a profit, just in case,” he said. “So it really was just another normal trading day and the sheep got fleeced as usual.” Source: FNT Staff

Photo credit: Original images at: Bitcoin , Investopedia , FrogDog

Report: Scientists Find That Australian Megabat Flying-foxes Are Main Cause of Climate Change

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Australian Bats-Climate Cng-FNT-Small.pngQUEENSLAND – A remarkable new climate change study by a group of scientists who were originally studying chaos theory has concluded that the Australian Flying-fox, a megabat that is sometimes seen as a ‘menace to society’ in its native habitat, is largely responsible for causing the huge variations in climatic conditions that have been happening around the world.

“I know that flies in the face (pun not intended) of the prevailing wisdom about climate change,” explained Rodney Overclause, Ph.D, who headed up the controversial research project involving the megabats. “But if you understand chaos theory, and look at it from that perspective, it’s the only logical explanation.”

A simplified description of chaos theory uses an example of the “butterfly effect”, basically that tiny changes introduced into a dynamic system will ultimately cause huge changes to happen down the road. An example might be: a butterfly flapping its wings in Japan can introduce enough change in a weather system to cause a wind-driven tsunami on the coast of California.

The study and report have raised the hackles of climate scientists around the world, with it being called in various quarters such names as: “egregious psudeoscience”, “climate heresy” and “pure poppycock”. The chaos theory scientists however are quick to defend the results of their research.

“I mean, just put two and two together,” said Doctor Ian Roganski, another of the researchers on the team’s controversial megabat climate change project. “If you consider what damage a butterfly can do, think about this. Flying-foxes are the largest bats in Australia. They weigh a couple of pounds each and have three-foot wingspans, for Pete’s sake. And they nest in great big colonies.”

His colleague jumped in to further add to the debate that, at the time of publication, is still raging.

“So can you imagine the effect of a couple of thousand of those big suckers taking off all at once?” Overclause asked. “Why, it just boggles the mind!”  Source: FNT Staff

Photo credit: Original images at: Australian Museum , Scientific American