B.C. Evens the Odds: Province Equips Grizzly Bear Population With AK47 Rifles

Grizzly-AK47-FNT-Small.pngVICTORIA – British Columbia ended the controversial trophy hunt of grizzly bears in the province in August of 2017. Recently however, the province surprised both the bears and the citizenry by ending the hunt throughout all of B.C.. As an extra measure of protection, they also  equipped the grizzlies with AK47 automatic rifles.

A spokesperson for the bears said that they: “… are absolutely delighted with this turn of events.”

A 2017 B.C. auditor general’s report criticized the province for not managing its grizzly population effectively, stating that the greatest threat to the bears was habitat loss, not hunting. The bears, however, disagreed with the report and lobbied for the rifles.

The bears were successful in their demands due to surprising support from the B.C. public at large. The province held consultations throughout B.C. and although 78 per cent of more than 4000 respondents recommended that the hunt be shut down completely, 99 percent opted for arming the bears, calling it a “social values issue.”  The bears agreed with this, 100 percent.

There are approximately15,000 grizzly bears in B.C. and the province recently issued a tender to suppliers to purchase 16,500 AK47s. A government spokesperson explained the overage in the tender.

“We built in a ten percent fudge factor, just in case,” he said. “As the bears haven’t used these equalizers before, we figured that some might possibly get damaged and there are also enough extra for replacements in case a few get lost along the way.  Source: FNT Staff

Photo credit: Original images at: OffGridQuest , Defenders of Wildlife , Evike.comWikipedia ,


Evidence Found that Bigfoot Family Lived Under B.C. Parliament Buildings

B.C. Parliament Bldgs-FNT-SmallVICTORIA, B.C. – Signs of early non-human habitation found under the Parliament buildings this week appear to confirm the existence of the mythic creature Bigfoot, in British Columbia.

Workers installing electrical conduit in a little-used sub-sub-basement section under the B.C. legislature found strong indications that the area might have once been inhabited by a non-human species. This included coarse tufts of hair and several smudged footprints pressed into the clay sediment near the foundation.

Melanie Hodicka, a cultural anthropologist from Burnaby who works for the province, said her research team was brought in to investigate the evidence. Hodika, a Bigfoot researcher who earned her PhD in cryptozoology at the University of Wisconsin, was excited about the find.

“They just found some rocks in Labrador last week that show the earliest life on earth” she said, pointing to the taped-off area under the 120-year-old stone structure where technicians from the team were setting up equipment to excavate the site. “But what’s the big deal about finding some 3-billion-year-old graphite? This, this, kind of fieldwork, where we can study organisms with flesh and blood, is the real stuff of nature!”

Hodika said that findings like this are extremely rare because the elusive creatures tend to shy away from areas of dense human population. She said that the signs here pointed to the existence of not just one Bigfoot, but possibly an entire family of the mysterious species, that probably used the location as a winter home. She called the discovery “major cool”  and  “a breakthrough!”  The Parliament buildings were evacuated when the evidence was discovered for reasons of public safety.

Raymond Arbuckle, a Bigfoot researcher from the University of Calgary, challenged the evidence found under the Parliament buildings in Victoria, saying that they were “quite unlikely” because all previous sightings of the creature had been recorded in the B.C. interior. “How,” he asked, “did they get all the way over there to the island, from the mainland?”

“It’s possible,” Hodika said, “that they might have used the ferry.” Source: FNT Staff