VALLEY OF THE KINGS– Archeological experts have confirmed that previously unidentified artifacts found in the tomb of the boy king Tutankhamun almost a hundred years ago are children’s multivitamins.
The pill-size gray oblong objects originally discovered among the funerary objects had been sitting in a formerly unclassified assortment of other flotsam from the site, since 1922. They were accidently included with a box of items sent along for analysis when a DNA test was done on the mummified remains in 2008.
“It’s one of the most important discoveries to come out of ancient Egypt,” said Raoul Gazarra, who heads up the largest exhibit of Tutankhamun artifacts, which is now on a seventeen country world tour. “I mean, think about it, vitamins….wow! It’s the strongest evidence as to why, other than the tad of scoliosis and the cleft palate, no serious congenital abnormalities were found in his mummy. They were way ahead of their time back then, when it came to looking after their health.”
The find was greeted by initial skepticism from the rest of the scientific community, but Gazarra put that down to what he said was “professional jealousy”. And he bristled when asked why it had taken the archeologists ninety-five years to identify and catalogue the vitamins.
“They had just been tumbled in among the walking sticks and shrine panels and such, and frankly, we just hadn’t gotten around to sorting them out,” he snapped.
Gazarra also said that one of the reasons for the long delay was that the objects had been offhandedly dismissed by the original team of artifact typologists as “maybe pebbles” or “possibly the petrified fecal material of a small rodent, eewwwww.”
The confirmation of the multivitamin discovery has not only stirred up the scientific community, but he said that there was commercial interest as well. When asked what it did for the future of the Tutankhamun exhibit, he was sanguine.
“We’re golden,” he said. “I think it’s safe to say that it puts paid to the alleged Curse of the Pharaohs. The funding opportunities here are enormous. We got a licensing offer from the Flintstones people just yesterday.” Source: FNT Staff